[Stg]

you guys here seem pretty mellow/rational imo, so i'd like to share a problem i'm currently having and get some input/advice on my situation.


so after getting used, disrespected, abused, stolen from, lied to, bullshitted around, put down, stood up, etc. throughout my whle life from people who were my "friends", i decided to just cut myself off from all social contact and live alone for the rest of my life to avoid drama/bad times/trouble and overall problems.

and in doing so i basically decided to just ignore everyone who tries to talk to me/call me. i figured it seemed reasonable enough, just mind my own business and that would be that, end of all my emotional stress. but now i have this group of people who basically made me public enemy number one, saying that i have the mentality of a ten year old, that i'm throwing "friendships" away for no reason, that i'm just casting myself out overdramatically, etc.

And they're making it look like i'm wrong in my decision, there's something wrong with me, etc. But these are the same people who have done stupid shit to me! The point is, i realize i probably cant hermit myself forever, but i really am tired of getting bs'ed around and fucked over by people, and right now i feel alot calmer and less depressed than i did over the past couple of years dealing with people, trying the whole "social life" thing.

What do you think i should do in your opinions? should i just shut everyone out and try to be at peace, or try to talk to these people and apologize/forgive and forget and start over, or try again elsewhere and not let things get to me, or whatever, i dunno what to do

[samurai6string]

Sometimes you just outgrow your friends. It doesn't mean you should stop talking to everyone, but maybe you need to move on past those particular "friends." Or keep some sort of superficial relationship like calling every few months, or messaging them on Myspace.

[bamboo]

When I was 27 I made the decision to cut a large group of people out of my life. Worked for me.

[zefff]

A true friend would accept your ignorance. Man, Ive got freinds I havent seen, spoke to or emailed in years!

Its upto each of us to work out the difference between a freind and an aquaintance - I only have 5 friends.

[The BadBoy]

Originally Posted by zefff

A true friend would accept your ignorance. Man, Ive got freinds I havent seen, spoke to or emailed in years!

Its upto each of us to work out the difference between a freind and an aquaintance - I only have 5 friends.

What he said, But I have 6 and I've not spoken to 4 of them for almost 2 years and yet when one of us calls the others will come running regardless.

A friend wouldn't care less if you spoke to them for a while or not. They would still be your friend and not get pissed at you. Real friends are people who can ignore you and whom you can ignore without any ill feeling towards each other and then when you hook up, it's like that whole year/two years you never saw each other didn't happen.

If you need your space, take it. If someone calls, answer them nad let them know you need some time away for yourself for a while. If they're friends they will understand. If they're not. Well who cares in that case, you got your solitude.

[bamboo]

STG-

Remember, no matter friends you have, essentially your always alone in this life.

-bamboo

[Stg]

ah, i knew you guys would give me good advice, thanks

[samurai6string]

Originally Posted by bamboo

STG-

Remember, no matter friends you have, essentially your always alone in this life.

-bamboo

You guys remember Debbie Downer on SNL? When I read this, I imagined the trumpet going "Wah-waaaaah," and a zoom in close up of Bamboo's avatar

[dscott]

If you think your friends are worth it.....don't push them away. It seems like you're running from the problem instead of confronting it. But then again, they might not be friends anymore...

[setsu nin to]

You dont need "friends", go and have you life. You need friends, real friends.